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Why do we care for people to care? Sometimes, we seek out in
hopes of catching a little magic off the feeling of owning something close to
our soul... but it is during those times, these feelings tied with hopes, tend
to go haywire. Until finally, it would become an enraged obsession.
I was fooling myself. I believed that a new place to start
over would put a closure to old chapters, and a new breeze to breathe would
definitely pull me out of my long-standing habit of redoing the same mistakes.
But I was wrong, yet again. With my new life, I had built a pretty ritualistic
routine of being the “uptight workaholic”. Truth be told, it was a mere attempt
to train my untamed heart from going for things, not meant for me to get
attached.
Three drinks down, I manage to sit up straight on the empty
evening terrace, as stars decide to shine on me kindly and I can almost hear their
whisper, questioning the reason for my present predilection. I ignore them and
look down at my empty glass and to my surprise I can see a tiny circular window
at the glass bottom. Its reflecting me that warm summer night I was out on the street
with him, walking alongside a person, who even though was righteously honest enough
to express his unsure disposition when it came to me, all I could see through
the glass, was that dreamy expression on my face, resigned to risk it all, at
the cost of getting hurt again.
I jump up on my feet in a heightened rush and smash the
glass on the floor and scream out to the stars, “Why didn’t you shine on me your
righteous wisdom and save me that night, eh?”
And the stars continued to do what they do best... twinkle away in silence. And
I do what I do best every other night... drown myself in some more magic.
P.S: Deeply inspired by the song “Chandelier” by Sia.
P.P.S: Back with a post after a long, long time. More posts
will follow, which will continue to unclearly explain what this writer is up to!!